The Social Contract of Cleanliness: Victorian Lessons for Modern Boundaries

Even today, with our current conversations about “boundaries,” the Victorian perspective reminds us that personal hygiene is not just a private matter; it is a social contract that respects the comfort and dignity of those around us.

The passage below is from How to Behave: A Pocket Manual of Republican Etiquette and Guide to Correct Personal Habits, published in 1857 by Samuel R. Wells. The book was part of the “Hand-Books for Home Improvement” series, which aimed to guide readers in matters of etiquette and social conduct.

During the Victorian era, cleanliness was closely associated with morality and social status. It was not only the upper classes who believed that maintaining personal hygiene was a sign of good character and respectability. Bathing and washing were seen as essential not only for health but also for social acceptance. But, it must be said, daily bathing was not as common as it is today; most people relied on washbasins and sponges for regular cleaning, with full baths being less frequent and more accessible to the wealthy.

Here is what How to Behave has to say on the matter:

The proper care and adornment of the person is a social as well as an individual duty. You have a right to go about with unwashed hands and face, and to wear soiled and untidy garments, perhaps, but you have no right to offend the senses of others by displaying such hands, face, and garments in society. Other people have rights as well as yourself, and no right of yours can extend so far as to infringe theirs.

So, our own personal habits, especially those related to cleanliness and appearance, directly impact the people around us. While we may indeed have the freedom to neglect our own hygiene in private, we are not entitled to impose discomfort or offense on others in public spaces. This principle—balancing personal liberty with social responsibility—remains foundational in modern etiquette and public norms.

There is more to come from How to Behave, but this brief introduction was an essential one. It underscores the fundamental principle that personal care is not just about self-respect, but also about respecting the rights and comfort of those around us. Put simply, good manners begin with consideration for others, a lesson as vital today as it was in the Victorian era.